Love Overflowing

One week, give or take…

This past Monday we took Zachary to the pediatrician for a check-up. We were anxious to see how he was growing. Surprisingly, all four of us made it to the pediatricians office with time to spare. Our appointment was at 8:20am. I think that is pretty impressive for a first outing.

When Zachary left the hospital, he had lost over 6% of his body weight. A little on the high side of normal. They didn’t tell us the exact weight at discharge but the night before, with a full bladder and a poopy belly, he weighed 7 lbs 4.3 oz. He had lost almost 10 ounces. We were hopeful that he had gained some weight back when we took him in 4 days later. We were hoping that the supplementing was making a difference. He was breastfeeding and taking about an ounce and a half of formula at every feeding.

His weight at the doctor’s office was 7 lbs 3 oz. Almost back to his pre-discharge weight. The pediatrician was not concerned at that point. We explained the situation with the breast milk and formula. She wanted us to try to increase his formula intake to 2-3 ounces every feeding and wake him every 2-3 hours to eat. She also said that she had never seen a baby that had not hint of yellow at all. That was a relief because Emily had to be on a bilibed when she came home.

We were hopeful that increasing the formula intake and frequency of feedings would help Zachary put on the weight that he needed. I ended up taking him to the pediatrician on Friday for an unrelated issue and he had gained 9 ounces from Monday to Wednesday! That’s some progress! He still isn’t up to his birth weight but he is well on his way! We still have to wake him every 2-3 hours to eat but it’s well worth it in order to put some meat on our little string bean. The doctor said that won’t last forever, soon we will be able to get more sleep at night but until he puts on some weight we have to continue. I am more than ok with that. Anything to help the little guy grow.

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Betrayed again…but with a better mindset.

My body doesn’t work the way it should. The fact that I had to go through IVF to conceive Emily proves that. Not only were we not able to conceive on our own but my body did not produce breast milk to feed my own child. It was a rude awakening with Emily. Never had I imagined that I wouldn’t be able to breastfeed her. It was a trying experience to say the least. The first two weeks of Emily’s life was both joyous and disappointing at the same time. I really wanted to be able to feed her. After many trips to the lactation consultant, we came to realize that she wasn’t getting any milk. With much sorrow, I succumbed and threw in the towel.

I went into the breastfeeding realm with Zachary with a whole different attitude. I was going to try to breastfeed but if it didn’t work, it didn’t work. It’s just food. Not love. Formula is not poison. Zachary latched on immediately and I could tell that he was getting colostrum. I had high hopes but realistic hopes. I would give it some time and see how it went. I was not opposed to supplementing my son. After issues with wet diapers, we decided to supplement on the last day in the hospital. I was continuing to breastfeed but wanted to make sure that he was getting what he needed in the meantime. Hoping that my milk would still come in.

I decided to be proactive. I got some Mother’s Milk Tea and Fenugreek. I was going to try to help the process along. Zachary continued to receive anything I was producing as well as some formula. And I was okay with that. A totally different story than the experience with Emily.

I am producing a little milk, not enough to sustain him, but some. The only reason is the Fenugreek. I am afraid that as soon as I stop taking it I will dry up. I continue to breastfeed before we give him a bottle. I know that he is getting the nutrition he needs as well as some added bonus from me. Every little bit of liquid gold is better than nothing. I know I won’t continue this forever but I want to do what I can for now.

Even though my body betrayed me yet again, I am in a better place. I know that Zachary is getting the nutrition that he needs and that is what counts. Everything else is just bonus.

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A few pictures….

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Arrival story

This is the story of Zachary’s birth….

After dinner Monday night, we dropped Emily off at Grandma and Papa’s house. It was hard to leave because I knew I would be away from her for a few days but Emily didn’t seem to mind. She was having a slumber party! She did great the entire time she spent with her grandparents.

I had a feeling that it was going to be a long night and I was right. The anticipation made it hard to sleep. The alarm buzzed way too early after drifting to sleep way too late. My stomach was full of butterflies. Soon, I was going to meet the newest man in my life. Stephen and I stopped at the donut shop for our “last breakfast” before heading. I had forgotten how dark it was at 5:30 am!

We arrived at the hospital at 6am sharp. Then came the tedious task of getting settled in and the show on the road. Finally the pitocin drip was started and around 8:30 or so the doctor came in to break my water. Things should finally start happening! Contractions were getting stronger but not as regular as we wanted. Zachary was not cooperating and wasn’t staying in the birth canal.

I received my epidural after I was dilated to around a 4. Definitely took the edge off. I should have know something wasn’t right when I started feeling pressure with every contraction. I waited too late to tell the nurse that something wasn’t right and started having pain. I think we saw almost every anesthesiologist on staff that morning. They adjusted the catheter, they upped the dosage, the added a boost…Finally, after laboring without meds for about 2 hours and throwing up in the process, they decided to remove the original epidural and put in a fresh one. By that point, my legs were totally numb. I couldn’t feel them nor move them. At all.

In the meantime, I had dilated to a 6. While sitting up and receiving an epidural for the second time I became complete and Zachary dropped to a station 2+. He was ready to come out! Luckily, the nurse was on top of her game and had called the dr already. Once I was in position, I really only had to push once and Zachary entered the world. It was an amazing feeling- knowing that I had brought this perfect little man into the world. He wasn’t crying like most newborns when he came out and I was very concerned. I remember asking repeatedly if he was ok. He was great. He just wasn’t crying. There were no problems whatsoever with him. What a relief!

It took us quite awhile to be moved to the postpartum side. Partially because there was another delivery at the same time and the fact that it took quite awhile for me to regain the feeling in my legs. Zachary got to spend the entire time in the room with us. That was really an excellent experience, as Emily was wisked off to the nursery shortly after being born. It was wonderful to get to experience everything with him. His first bath, his first nursing session…everything.

Despite having the epidural not work the first time I would not have changed a thing. The important part was that Zachary was born healthy and perfect. He latched on right away when I first tried nursing. He was such a content little baby after birth- only crying when he had his diaper changed.

Emily was immediately in love! She was waiting out in the waiting room and was the first person back to see him. She walked up to us and said “Hi baby brother. Ah boo boo boo!” It truly brought tears to my eyes. She told him how much she loved him and asked to hold him. She has been such a great big sister!

My family is now complete. God is amazing. I thought my life was complete and He decided that we needed a son. I am glad He did.

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Zachary Daniel


January 12, 2010
7 lb 13 oz
21 1/2 inches long



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The clock is ticking….

This pregnancy has been a whirlwind! I cannot believe that I am looking at the final days of feeling this little guy kicking around.  It’s bittersweet. I LOVE being pregnant. Feeling him kick and move around is the best feeling. A baby is growing inside of me! At the same time, I am tired, cranky and hurting. The Braxton hicks are never-ending, my back hurts and there is so much pressure. I try not to complain too much and focus on the positive. In less than a week, Stephen and I will finally get to meet this little man who has been causing me so much pain and joy. Emily will be a big sister. She can stop yelling “wake up baby brother” to my belly and yell at him in person. It is going to be an adventure and learning process for sure but I think I am ready. I better be because there is no turning back now.

I was not happy with my last doctor’s visit. The last few actually but it is what it is. We had an ultrasound and the little boy seems to be doing great. Growing well and ready to go. I didn’t actually get to see my doctor- which I am a bit upset about since I haven’t seen him in over a month. The nurse practitioner, who is normally very good, didn’t even check me out. I have no idea of where I am at progress-wise and that bugs me. I should have insisted but didn’t. So much for standing up for my own care.  The doctor did call me back that evening. If Zachary doesn’t come this weekend, he will be born next week.

There was part of me that kind of felt guilty for scheduling an induction. Maybe he isn’t ready, am I missing out on the experience of the last week and a half???? The other part says I am ready. I really want to try to avoid a c-section and going at 38 1/2 weeks will most likely ensure that. Emily was a big girl and if her head was any bigger I would have faced a c-section. I know a c-section isn’t the end of the world but I would rather not have one. And probably shouldn’t have one due to my Chron’s disease.

That said…We are scheduled to go into the hospital at 6am Tuesday morning. Since I have no idea of what kind of progress I have made I have no idea how long the process might take. Surely the Braxton hicks should have caused some progress. A little over a week ago, I was a finger-tip dilated and anterior so it couldn’t have gone backwards.

Just a few more days and I get to meet this little guy and show him how much he is loved already.


2009 – oh how you were full of surprises….

I should have done this post awhile ago but somehow have never found the time to sit down at the computer. The whole nesting thing is alive and well. Anyone who tells you that phenomenon does not exist is trying to sell you a bill of goods!

2009…..What can I say?? It was a year of HUGE surprises. One really. But I think it trumps almost everything else so I could just stop writing here…But I won’t.  The news changed our lives but it wasn’t the only thing that occurred.

A few highlights:

  • Stephen and I celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary.
  • We vacationed in San Diego. Emily STILL talks about it on a weekly basis.
  • Emily turned 3. She is the most amazing kid you could meet. I might be biased….
  • I took on a weight loss challenge and eventually one. That proved to me that I CAN do it. I have to put my mind to it but I can lose the weight I want. It’s not easy…
  • The biggest thing…Finding out that I was pregnant. For so long, we believed that Emily was going to be an only child. God obviously had plans otherwise. I have gone through all the emotions: shock, dismay, fear, and ultimately joy. It’s going to be a huge transition but so totally worth it.

The year had its ups and downs but, all in all, it was an amazing year. Let’s hope 2010 is just as good, if not better!

Thanks to all of my friends and family who have been with us throughout the journey! Couldn’t have done it without you!

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Website suggestions…

I have been on the look out for more websites for crafts and learning for Emily. I need to update the links on the side but I thought I would share these and see if anyone has any other suggestions of sites that they like.

  • Free Kids Crafts
  • Crayola– great ideas for crafts, printables, etc.
  • Preschool Activity Box– “materials to develop their preschool children’s ability and skills through various fun learning activities.”
  • Funschool– Preschoolers can learn their ABC’s, study math, and begin reading using the games on Funschool.
  • Nick Jr– of course.
  • DLTK’s growing together– This site is really cool. It has crafts, printables, ABCs, numbers, etc.

I am sure I will run across some more but these are a few that I have found over the past few days. Take a look- you might see something you  like!

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